The Bachelorette || Des is Back

5.20.2013

All you die-hard bachelor fans are counting days. One one week. Only 7 days. Only 168 hours (give or take) until the first rose ceremony of The Bachelorette. And who is the bachelorette this year?
None other than Miss Desiree, last season's sweetheart. We all know her as the optimistic, fun-loving bridal consultant with the psycho brother. She was one of Adam's favorites - he picked her from day number one (but then again... he also picked Tierra and we all know how that turned out). She captured America's heart, now who are the men who will be competing for her love? Well... let me introduce them. With a little commentary added by yours truly, Adam, Madison, and Drew....

Ben - Age: 28 - Occupation: Entrepreneur 
Opinion: He looks somewhat normal actually. We will call him the normal one. But those are always the ones you've got to watch out for. Maybe a fighter? Maybe a crier? We will see how he turns up in the show.

Brad - Age: 27 - Occupation: Accountant/DJ
Opinion: Teeth whitener much? Teeth whitener much? Teeth whitener much? Hey guy, nice make up. (that all came from the guys) But in all seriousness - he looks like a dark skin - dark hair version of Sean. He will be in there for awhile. 

Brandon - Age: 28 - Occupation: Painting Contractor
Opinion: Where is the bleach for that spiked hair guy?! Wild. Card.

Brian - Age: 29 - Occupation: Financial advisor
Opinion: Financial consultant with a great personality... but we are thinking she will get bored.
 Give Des some danger!

Brooks - Age: 28 - Occupation: Sales and Marketing
Opinion: Do you know Jef? Are you, like, with people water? Utah loves you. 
And by Utah I mean ever single LDS girl. Come to Provo.

Bryden - Age: 26 - Occupation: Iraq War Veteran
Opinion: That's the werewolf. Russian werewolf. With a kindergarten hairdo. But also. 
We think Des will love his American pride - who doesn't love a hero? 
War veteran looks good on him and we thank him for all his work.

Chris - Age: 27 - Occupation: Mortgage Broker
Opinion: Send this guy to silicon valley. Mostly because he needs a littttle tan.

Dan - Age: 30 - Occupation: Beverage Sales Director
Opinion: Whooooa. I think he ate too many carrots. Dan the tan man.
If he toned down the tan he would be a real looker

Diogo - Age: 29 - Occupation: Marketing Manager
Opinion: Did you just shave your chest? And where is your gold chain? 
That shirt needs a gold chain to complete the look.

Drew - Age: 27 - Occupation: Digital Marketing Analyst
Opinion: This guy belongs in Provo. He looks a little like Captain America. His boyish grin will get him a rose or five - lets hope his personality matches.

James - Age: 27 - Occupation: Sales
Opinion: Kardishian's long lost family? Eyebrows a little too clean cut. 
His skin looks as smooth as a baby's bottom.

Jonathan - Age: 26 - Occupation: Attorney
Opinion: He looks normal... we are drawing a blank on this. Actually. 
He sort of looks like Calen. Please be the villain!? 

Jaun Pablo - Age: 31 - Occupation: Former Pro Soccer Player
Opinion: Or as we like to call him... Harry Larry. Shave that neard brother. And we are wondering where that v neck goes down to. He will be the Graham of this season.

Kasey - Age: 29 - Occupation: Advertising Executive
Opinion: What is he sitting on? Looks like he just got his pants lit on fire. 
He look like the funny and possibly loud guy.

Larry - Age: 31 - Occupation: ER Doctor
Opinion: We guess he is okay. Doctor guy. Looks pretty smart. Also... looks nice. 
We don't picture him being the rich snotty guy - but the rich nice guy that is super chill.

Micah - Age: 32 - Occupation: Law Student
Opinion: He looks like a nice guy. We think either too nice and we wont even hear from him or 
so nice that she just cant help but keep him around.

Michael G. - Age: 33 - Occupation: Federal Prosecutor
Opinion: Sweet Bro. I want to know what pre-workout he takes. 
Des likes the muscles, you get a rose.

Mike R. - Age: 27 - Occupation: Dental Student/Model
Opinion: "Do I have something in my teeth?" But... dental student slash model from London? 
She'll go for that.

Mikey T. - Age: 30 - Occupation: Plumbing Contractor
Opinion: G.T.L. That about sums it up... 

Nick M. - Age: 27 - Occupation: Investment Advisor
Opinion: He looks sincere... and like someone peer pressured him to un-button those 
top buttons of his shirt. We think he will stay around - the handsome good guy.

Nick R. - Age: 26 - Occupation: Tailor/Magician
Opinion: Buddy? Buddy from Cake Boss? Maybe he would make some good pasta? We don't know. Looks like a guy that will stay through the first round or two without much airtime.
Also... his limo appearance will be awesome. We are sensing a trick of some sorts.

Robert - Age: 30 - Advertising Entrepreneur
Opinion: Wait... they let 12 year olds on the show now!? At least he will always look young for Miss Des. Bonuses. To be honest. He looks like the Biebs in his twenties. But I wouldnt have guessed 30.

Will - Age: 28 - Occupation: Banker
Opinion: I feel bad for him, but he has a 5 head. And we can't really get pass that. 
Looking forward to meeting him on the show.

Zack K. - Age: 28 - Occupation: Book Publisher
Opinion: A book publisher? That's different and will probably keep him in there for a little. Looks normal. Not too many buttons undone on the shirt... we appreciate a one button undone guy. 

Zak W. - Age: 31 - Occupation: Drilling Fluid Engineer
Opinion: This must have been snapped right before he fell out of his chair. 
He looks happy-go-lucky. We like it.

And there you have it folks. There seems to be a lot of people that deal with money (investment, broker, banker) and, as always, lots of marketing and entrepreneurship.  Obvs all of our comments are based mostly on looks with a little of opinion on their jobs and whatnot... heck, we don't even know the guys. But anyone can judge a book by the cover. We mean no serious offense to the guys putting their heart on the line.
  • Who are your favorites this season?
  • Have you read any spoilers? [DON'T TELL ME WHAT HAPPENS!]
  • Are you excited to see Des as the Bachelorette?
We (even if the boys won't admit it) are excited to start the season off right and get to know these guys for whatever ABC portrays them as. Look forward to more opinions on ABC's The Bachelor[ette], right here!

Love,
Deidre - Adam - Madi - Drew

All photos compliments of ABC.
TheTinyHeart said...

I'm kinda disappointed...this is the best they could do for Des?!

-Sharon
The Tiny Heart
Target Giveaway!

Amanda Schroeder said...

K. You make me laugh. So freakin hard. The Russian werewolf with a kindergarten hairdo? You're gonna make me pee my pants. SO freakin funny.

we&serendipity

Sadie Nilsson said...

This is hilarious! I've never been too faithful at watching the bachelor/bachelorette, but now I want to know how close you are to being accurate about these men.

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