Taking Back My Health

Yesterday I introduced you to my word of the year. And while I am not planning to make a bunch of empty resolutions. I am going to make some open ended resolutions that can evolve and change with me as the year continues on. Over the next few days I will introduce you to the promises I have made for myself in 2014. They could be considered resolutions, but I am looking at them as promises. Because I know who I want to be, and I am DONE making excuses. I am done with the pity parties when things aren't going the way I want or when something is working better for someone else. I am promising myself that this year I will become closer, day by day, to the person I want to be.

So my first promise? To take back my health. My life has been a yo-yo of getting fit, gaining weight, back issues, fitting into clothing, needing new clothing, acne, and so on. I could take you through a lot of sob stories. About being picked on for my weight and people saying mean things about me, about having back surgery when I was in high school, about being diagnosed with PCOS... but if I did that I would also have to admit I have a serious addiction to treats. Like, it's bad. I can't stop. I would have to tell you about how sometimes I am too lazy to get back out of bed to go take my medicine, so I just skip a day. And I would have to admit that sometimes if I am about to go to the gym and my show comes on, I get so wrapped up in the TV I just skip the gym. Basically, there are things out of my control and things in my control. And I have to admit I am not controlling the things I can and I am letting things that are out of my control take control of me. Not okay.

So health is applying to more than just losing weight. I want to be healthy. I want to be strong. I want to eat right. I want to be in the right place mentally, always. I want to remember that birth control messes with hormones and conquer those crazy spells. I want to have a clear face. I want to remember to take my PCOS medicine so I don't relapse. I want to break my treat addiction. I want to get to a place where I am not second guessing the way I look. I want to feel happy about what I eat and not get sick because I want "one more". I want to take back my health. And I am going to take back my health. I think it will be a long process. But it will be worth it.